newness can suck

So here I am in a new city again. Everytime I do this it gets harder. Usually when I have moved in the past it was for school, read automatic social life. Now I live in Sacramento no job, one friend who is moving soon and no life.
I am starting to freak out. What the hell was I thinking. I am back to having to consider choping off my hair again jsut so the queers will talk to me. I hate that sterotype, mainly that it works against me.

perhaps I should make some t-shirts that read "I'm lonely, talk to me" of course than only the wrong people would.
When did I lose the ability to be outgoing? I used to be so good at it. I think I am getting old, the idea of having to find and develop a whole new set of friends just sounds exausting not exciting.